What was it like, when Adam and Eve realized that they were naked? Nakedness used to mean nothing for them. But once they found out, everything seem to rotate around it. Quickly grabbed some leaves to veil the nakedness. And keep themselves covered since then. Once awake, things would never be the same.
I know what it’s like. Or sort of.
I didn’t care much about pregnancy, babies, or little children. To me, pregnancy means that you ought to give your seat to any pregnant ladies you meet at the bus or train, because they need it much more than you do. That’s it, no more. Babies mean cute little humans, with adorable innocent eyes. Little children don’t differ much from babies.
Similar to Adam and Eve, things are never the same, once I’m awake.
Now pregnancy means a lot to me. I would do anything to keep my pregnancy and save my baby. But there was nothing I could do, than to let it go. And wait. Prepare myself well. Start all over again.
Suddenly my world is full of pregnant ladies, babies, and little children. It seems that they simply pop out from nowhere!
- A dear friend of mine who lives abroad is pregnant ^^
- A fellow debater is going to hold a baby shower at a karaoke this Friday (yippie…!!!) ^^ beware guys, for Whitney Charlotte Houston Church is coming!!! ^^
- My colleagues’ wives (about 3 or 4 of them) are pregnant ^^
- Another dear friend who lives in Semarang is pregnant ^^
- A high school roommate I’ve never seen in years is pregnant ^^
- The pretty lady I meet at the bus daily is pregnant.
- Today’s Kompas Female share some tips on pregnancy.
- All the ladies at the obstetrician’s waiting room are pregnant (of course-lah ^^)
- Two dear friends of mine had just given birth to healthy babies ^^
- A colleague had just have a baby girl ^^
- A dear friend’s son is 1 year old today ^^
- I saw a friend’s beautiful two year-old girl photo at FB today ^^
Everyday, I would meet beautiful pregnant ladies (they look pretty to my eyes since then). Adorable little babies (would have hugged and kissed them, had their parents let me!). Cute, innocent, happy go-lucky children.
Believe me when I say that this world is full of pregnancies, babies, and children!!! ^^
Oh, how I smile to see them! And then how my heart cries! I want to be like them! I want to be pregnant! I want to have my own babies! My own kids! I want to hold a baby shower! I want to celebrate my kids’ birthdays! Buy them toys and clothes, send them to school!
Yet there are still 2,5 months to go. I have to wait for 40 days + 3 months (started from June 23). Then I’m allowed to be pregnant again.
But oh, the wait! I mind waiting, I really do. But I have to wait for my womb to heal. So that the coming little fetus would have a good place to stay and grow.
I wish I could go to a lonely tropical island, or a serene villa on the mountainous area, to wait there. Read novels, watch TV and movies, sip my coffee, have a long vacation while waiting for the time to pass. To a place where I won’t have to see pregnant ladies, babies, children, or even hear about them.
But ah, no. It’s not meant for me. I’m not running away from challenges! See, I don’t have wings. It means that I’m not a chicken. I’m anything but a coward!!!
Yea, pregnancies, babies and children make me smile as well as cry. To me, they are blessings as well as challenges from God. I have to face them. Challenges from God are to be accepted happily. Maybe He is training me to be a tougher woman. I believe there’s a silver lining behind those challenges.
After believe, comes hope. I have a plenty of hopes and opportunities to be pregnant and have my own babies.
After hope, comes pray. I pray to the Lord to send me healthy babies when the time is right.
After pray… well, I don’t know. I guess I’ll just leave it to God, and… wait.
Another 2,5 months to go ^^